Taking your husband's name

Chilenita · Comandante

RE: Taking your husband's name

PRINCESSA · TOP Guru

Even my brothers, wouldn't marry the girl if they didn't accept their last name. Please, that's rude. It's an honour.

I don't know to us it's a MUST!

El Duro · Foro Master

See nena didn't take my name which is better for me

PRINCESSA · TOP Guru

I would defenitly take my hubby's last name, just that I would also keep my maiden in the middle, osea -

I luv how they do it in Ecaudor, which is: Pamela Garcia de Perez. I wish we could do this here.

Chilenita · Comandante

So I never changed my name. I assumed it at work at first but now I still go my my last name.

How about you lahtina did you stick it out?

Chilenita · Comandante

Ke Te Pika wrote:

, AHI LE LLAMO A LA MIGRA AL VATO.

I got me one of them legal ones KE TE PIKA

He is a bit of a freshie but NOT THAT FRESH!! lol

Ke Te Pika · Guru

ZIPOTE: SIN PEDO, AHI LE LLAMO A LA MIGRA AL VATO. SI SE PELA, A MONTARLE VERGA SE HA DICHO.

**im playing Chilenita, seriously im playing, dont hurt me.**

ZIPOTE · TOP Guru

Ke Te Pika wrote:

SO CHILE U'RE MARRIED??? I TAKE EVERY BAD THING BACK...DONT WANT EL PIBE TO COME KICK MY ASS... CONGRATS.

TOOOOO LATE THEY`RE GONA RUUUSSSH YOU POR SEROTE .............

Ke Te Pika · Guru

SO CHILE U'RE MARRIED??? I TAKE EVERY BAD THING BACK...DONT WANT EL PIBE TO COME KICK MY ASS...

CONGRATS.

GENIE · Foro Master

OMG BREAKING NEWS GUYS ITS TRUE!!

IT WAS A WEDDING BUT NOT A WEDDING THE BACHLORETTE PARTY TO COME!! THE OFFICIAL WEDDING IS COMING .........

SO STAY TUNED FOR EVENTS REGARDING CHILENTINA!!

JUST CONFIRMED BUT "ANITA" MY MAID OF HONOUR AND HER CUZIN SMALL FACKING WORLD@!!!!

Guadalupana · Foro Master

If it's True:

CONGRATULATION CHILE! WISH YOU ALL THE BEST!

Afrodita · Guru

Chilenita wrote:

Yeah well they are not bugging me anymore! I got hitched a month ago in a secret ceremony at an undisclosed location with my long time on again off again Argentino love!!!
I am still very much the independant woman and I am not quitting my soccer team! Oh and I am still very much a sexual deviant....so is he

No way!!!!!!!!!
Are you serious Chile?

God · Foro Master

Chilenita wrote:

miguel wrote:
TV Buff wrote: Chilenita wrote: How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!! YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married? we all know chile married someone to get him papers, lol :)
I am not mentally retarded!!!!

U better got a prenup!

TV Buff · TOP Guru

Chilenita wrote:

I got hitched a month ago in a secret ceremony at an undisclosed location with my long time on again off again Argentino love!!! I am still very much the independant woman and I am not quitting my soccer team! Oh and I am still very much a sexual deviant....so is he

You b%tch! (Pardon my Quechua!) And you didn't invite us? And you haven't said anything in el foro? All those "i'm putting together a bachelorette party for a friend" threads, and all those marriage/wedding threads were for you? Oh, you make me sick! I hate people who are too private (LadyBug, you're next...)

But congratulations anyway. Now I have to meet you AND hubby!

Guadalupana · Foro Master

GENIE wrote:

i did the whole nine yards!! LOL MY FATHER MADE ME HES LIKE OH IF U DONT ITS WRONG BLA BLA BLA!! AND WELL MY EX HUSBAND BEING A MACHO WAS THE SAME WAY SO I DID IT AND CHANGED ALL MY IDS AND EVERYTHING!!!
SO NEEDLESS TO SAY NOW THAT IM DIVORCING! I HAVE TO CHANGE IT ALL BACK ONCE THE DIVORCE IS FINALIZED BUT I HAVE TO GET PROOF OF MY MAIDEN NAME AND GET MY FINGERPRINTS AND SO MUCH FACKING DRAMA!!

That really does suck...but now i wonder, why in the first place would you girls marry un hombre que deplano es machista? WHY WHY WHY!
My hubby from the beginning knew que si se ponia con babosadas HOLY may god help him!
Back to this to keep or not to keep your maiden name...i'm glad i took his.

Chilenita · Comandante

miguel wrote:

TV Buff wrote: Chilenita wrote: How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!! YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married? we all know chile married someone to get him papers, lol :)

I am not mentally retarded!!!!

God · Foro Master

Chilenita wrote:

Lahtina wrote:
Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere. So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames.

Lahtina you wouldn't even assume his last name? If you do that you can still say your actual last name anytime you want because legally it would still be the same. How about when you have children?
I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet.
Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later

*********screeching tires *********

Waaaiiiiit a minute are ya ????? noooooo are yaaaa ?

Chilenita · Comandante

TV Buff wrote:

Chilenita wrote: How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!! YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married?

Yeah well they are not bugging me anymore! I got hitched a month ago in a secret ceremony at an undisclosed location with my long time on again off again Argentino love!!!

I am still very much the independant woman and I am not quitting my soccer team! Oh and I am still very much a sexual deviant....so is he

Lahtina · Foro Master

TV Buff wrote:

Chilenita wrote: How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!! YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married?

Oooooooooooooh, busted!!!

GENIE · Foro Master

TV Buff wrote:

Chilenita wrote: How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!! YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married?

OMG UR MARRIED CHILE!!! WHAT U MEAN UR MARRIED IM CALLINGUR WORK RIGHT NOW MISSY!!1

miguel · TOP Guru

TV Buff wrote:

Chilenita wrote:
How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later

Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!!
YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married?

we all know chile married someone to get him papers, lol :)

GENIE · Foro Master

i did the whole nine yards!! LOL MY FATHER MADE ME HES LIKE OH IF U DONT ITS WRONG BLA BLA BLA!! AND WELL MY EX HUSBAND BEING A MACHO WAS THE SAME WAY SO I DID IT AND CHANGED ALL MY IDS AND EVERYTHING!!!

SO NEEDLESS TO SAY NOW THAT IM DIVORCING! I HAVE TO CHANGE IT ALL BACK ONCE THE DIVORCE IS FINALIZED BUT I HAVE TO GET PROOF OF MY MAIDEN NAME AND GET MY FINGERPRINTS AND SO MUCH FACKING DRAMA!!

Lahtina · Foro Master

Chilenita wrote:

Lahtina wrote: Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere. So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames. Lahtina you wouldn't even assume his last name? If you do that you can still say your actual last name anytime you want because legally it would still be the same. How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later

No to hyphenation, no to assuming, NO, NO, NO! I think it should be enough that the kids are going to get stuck with the lastname. Oooooh! That should totally give me the right to pick the first name! Yes!

TV Buff · TOP Guru

Chilenita wrote:

How about when you have children? I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet. Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later

Okay, so wait a sec there, Missy! You're not getting out of this one so easy!!!

YOU are married? Super-duper-independent-woman-soccer-player-sexual-deviant-my-aunts-in-chile-keep-bugging-me-to-get-married-Chilenita is married?

miguel · TOP Guru

i have no issues letting someone keep their last name.. i would not force someone to take on my own.

Guadalupana · Foro Master

Lahtina wrote:

Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere.
So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames.

I love Dr.Seuss

Chilenita · Comandante

Lahtina wrote:

Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere. So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames.

Lahtina you wouldn't even assume his last name? If you do that you can still say your actual last name anytime you want because legally it would still be the same. How about when you have children?

I assumed my hubby's last name. I still say my original last name when I feel like it but it keeps his parents quiet.

Okay Lahtina de Jesus....talk to ya later

miguel · TOP Guru

Luna Chiquitita wrote:

Did you all know that in some parts of Europe its not such a big deal about the last names? A friend of a friend got married in Germany last year where apparently the last name change isn't a major issue. In fact, her husband took on her last name out of respect to her and their future children.
The back story is that she's black and he's German (aka white), his last name in German means Black or Blackie (something to that affect) so, he decided that he didn't want his wife or kids to go thru any sort of ridicule because of his last name, so he lovingly took her last name and again, no one there thought it was a major issue for him to do this.
Now THAT is something these MACHO latino men can learn.
BTW, I didn't take on my husband's last name.

that's funny.. two of my mother's sisters married germans and live in germany. they both took their wives' last name rather than keep their own (vallenas as opposed to schmidt and sczyzlinkski)
!

God · Foro Master

Lahtina wrote:

Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere.
So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames.

I'm glad he accepted and respected your wish, good boy. Ese es mi Mark chingao !

Lahtina · Foro Master

Well I say NO even to hyphenation. NO, NO, NO... as in no way, Jose; never, you're out of your mind if you think so. Not in a box. Not with a fox. Not in a house. Not with a mouse. I would not take them here or there, I would not take them anywhere.

So... after some discussions along those terms, Mark has accepted my wishes to keep my lastnames.

Maracuya · Guru

I'd always write my name with the guy's last name to see if it would match well, 50% of the time it would

but yeah i do like my last name and after reading your experiences, i've decided the following, so thanks for posting this thread.

I may very well decide not to take his last name. he'd probably wouldn't want to give it away anyways, lol

but definitely pass his last name to the children.

i like the idea of assuming the last name but not changing it legally.

the farthest i'd go is hyphenating the two names.

thanks for the ideas!

Chilenita · Comandante

TV Buff wrote:

Chilenita wrote: You can assume your husbands last name and not change it legally.....that's what I did Yes, we know, Mrs. Bernal.

I facking wish!!! I would tatoo his last name on my eyelid!!

TV Buff · TOP Guru

Chilenita wrote:

You can assume your husbands last name and not change it legally.....that's what I did

Yes, we know, Mrs. Bernal.

Chilenita · Comandante

You can assume your husbands last name and not change it legally.....that's what I did

Julie · Comandante

Well, I never changed my name when got married. I am not somebody's property " x DE y" what is with that ? Plus, it is a lot of paperwork since in most places, now, you have to request the change. Never the less, at work and social life, I always have introduced myself or been introcuded with both our names, without the DE in the middle. I guess people knew I would not take it very well (I was know to have a very strong caracter, don't think so though).

Afrodita · Guru

I wouldn't like to take my husband's last name. I very much like my own. Maybe just maybe I would hyphenated it if he insisted, I have a short name anyways, so It wouldn't be a big deal.

God · Foro Master

Lahtina wrote:

In Mexico women do not take the husband's name. If they want to somehow make it clear that they are married, a Juana Pérez, for example, married to a José López would write her name or introduce herself as Juana Pérez de López but it's not by any means her legal name in accordance with the prophecy.
Anyway, because I never grew up expecting to have my name changed once I was married, I don't want to change it now that I am. I know I don't have to but it reeeeeally bugs my inlaws that I don't want to.
What is your opinion on taking the husband's surname?

I know..it's so stupid the "DE" so macho so stupid !

I would say to my parner ..keep you name and you keep yours Deal ...a lastname change doesn't gonna make us a better couple or have better sex or have a perfect marriage... it's just a stupid Tag.

-- Edited by God at 09:29, 2005-11-24

Luna Chiquitita · Guru

Did you all know that in some parts of Europe its not such a big deal about the last names? A friend of a friend got married in Germany last year where apparently the last name change isn't a major issue. In fact, her husband took on her last name out of respect to her and their future children.

The back story is that she's black and he's German (aka white), his last name in German means Black or Blackie (something to that affect) so, he decided that he didn't want his wife or kids to go thru any sort of ridicule because of his last name, so he lovingly took her last name and again, no one there thought it was a major issue for him to do this.

Now THAT is something these MACHO latino men can learn.

BTW, I didn't take on my husband's last name.

chica wow · Guru

@Guadalupana..I understand that by the man asking you to marry him and by the women saying yes your lives become one and accept everything that comes with it but the name thing I don't agree with. I have already been married and did not change my name, my ex-husband at that time agreed with me. So I guess if your husband is fine with it then there is no problem.

Guadalupana · Foro Master

chica wow wrote:

How come the women have to take on the husband last name?? why can't the husband take on the wifes last name??
I would not change my last name because yo no soy propiedad de nadie...and like Angelita said "It's too much of a hassel to change all your documents with your new name" and to add to this, you have to go through the paper work again when you get divorced.

Well if you want a reason i guess it would make sense to say the reason a woman takes the last name of the man and not the other way around, is because he asked you to marry him, and by saying yes, you're not only saying yes to the rock he's showing you, but you're also saying 'yes, i want to be part of YOUR life and all that comes with it...maybe if the girl asked the guy more often for his hand it's be the other way around?

Y mira, en el tomar el nombre del marido no significa que sos propiedad de el, it's not like he's branding you. And yes, it's a hassle getting all those documents changed, but it doesn't have to be done the next day you get married. I still have so much stuff to change.

Never say never. That's what i said, and now look at me. AND i'm not complaining.

TV Buff · TOP Guru

chica wow wrote:

How come the women have to take on the husband last name?? why can't the husband take on the wifes last name?? I would not change my last name because yo no soy propiedad de nadie...and like Angelita said "It's too much of a hassel to change all your documents with your new name" and to add to this, you have to go through the paper work again when you get divorced.

But don't you get married thinking that you will never get divorced? Do people do this? Get married thinking down the road you will get a divorce, planning for it? I know it happens, but you don't start thinking about it from the get-go. You plan your life from the beginning of marriage meaning for it to be forever. If not, then why do it?

chica wow · Guru

How come the women have to take on the husband last name?? why can't the husband take on the wifes last name??

I would not change my last name because yo no soy propiedad de nadie...and like Angelita said "It's too much of a hassel to change all your documents with your new name" and to add to this, you have to go through the paper work again when you get divorced.

Guadalupana · Foro Master

I too took my hubby's last name, if i had hyphenated it my name would have been 6 names long!
Yeah, my parents were creative when they named me.

I did very much like my mother's maiden name and still do, but i usually used my dad's last name. Now, with my hubby's very italian last name, it took me some time to adjust and get used to how my name sounded with the new last name.

But like you Latihna, i used to joke with my inlaws and then fiancee that i was going to keep my last name...but they didn't seem to like that very much, it was a very big deal that i carried their son's name...a form of respect i guess. In the end, it's just a name, you know who you are and where you came from and no inlaw can ever take that away from you, even if your name changes...it's only on paper.

TV Buff · TOP Guru

Lahtina wrote:

Anyway, because I never grew up expecting to have my name changed once I was married, I don't want to change it now that I am. I know I don't have to but it reeeeeally bugs my inlaws that I don't want to. What is your opinion on taking the husband's surname?

I did take my hubby's last name even though I loooooved my last name. Now I wish I'd at least hyphenated it. I told hubby that if I ever write books or publish anything, I'll use my maiden name, only because I would love to make it famous (ego booster). He doesn't like that, but it's something that I always wanted to do, even since I was a child.

No one in my family has changed their last name of the ones that have married here in Canada, and the husbands don't mind, even though all of them are the typical latino machos, but I guess that's decided individually. What does Mark say about it? Is he okay with you keeping your last name? Would it be an issue if you didn't?

Lahtina · Foro Master

Dogo wrote:

Lahtina wrote: confundida wrote: NO NO HE HASNT HEARD THE REAL FORO VERSION!!!!!! Actually, the foro version does not have all the pouting, screaming, ****ing and moaning. Ooooooh ya! I think I like your version better!

LMAO That was supposed to be b*tching. Dogo, you're sick! LOL

Dogo · Comandante

Lahtina wrote:

confundida wrote: NO NO HE HASNT HEARD THE REAL FORO VERSION!!!!!! Actually, the foro version does not have all the pouting, screaming, ****ing and moaning.

Ooooooh ya! I think I like your version better!

Lahtina · Foro Master

confundida wrote:

NO NO HE HASNT HEARD THE REAL FORO VERSION!!!!!!

Actually, the foro version does not have all the pouting, screaming, ****ing and moaning.

confundida · Foro Master

Lahtina wrote:

confundida wrote: Lahtina wrote: Colombiana4Life wrote: Well, I changed mine when I got married. I didnt see it as a biggie. But at times I wish I had hyphenated it. Like my married last name-maiden, or however the order is. I never liked that term "de" in spanish. It makes it sound like such propiedad. Which is exactly why I absosmurfly do not want to take Mark's. It's De Jesus. (gag me with a spoon ) But even if it was one I really liked, I still wouldn't want to take it. I want to keep both of my lastnames. I like them. And if I decide to hyphenate... HOLY LONG NAME! (pun intended - having the De Jesus at the end) in accordance with the prophecy. WHEN IS THE NEXT FORO GATHERING??? THERE A COUPLE OF THINGS MARK NEEDS TO FIND OUT!!!!!!! LOL... Oh, he knows exactly how I feel, don't worry.

NO NO HE HASNT HEARD THE REAL FORO VERSION!!!!!!

Lahtina · Foro Master

confundida wrote:

Lahtina wrote: Colombiana4Life wrote: Well, I changed mine when I got married. I didnt see it as a biggie. But at times I wish I had hyphenated it. Like my married last name-maiden, or however the order is. I never liked that term "de" in spanish. It makes it sound like such propiedad. Which is exactly why I absosmurfly do not want to take Mark's. It's De Jesus. (gag me with a spoon ) But even if it was one I really liked, I still wouldn't want to take it. I want to keep both of my lastnames. I like them. And if I decide to hyphenate... HOLY LONG NAME! (pun intended - having the De Jesus at the end) in accordance with the prophecy. WHEN IS THE NEXT FORO GATHERING??? THERE A COUPLE OF THINGS MARK NEEDS TO FIND OUT!!!!!!!

LOL... Oh, he knows exactly how I feel, don't worry.

Dogo · Comandante

you should've married a woman!