After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
*You do not work 8 hours straight. *You fall asleep after brief work periods. *You do not always follow the orders of the management team. *You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. *You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated to start working. *You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. *You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing protective clothing. *You will retire well before you are 65. *You are unable to work double shifts. *You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task. *And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the work place carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management
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"To be a good Promoter you must have the heart of a Gambler and the mind of a Computer"
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
*I do physical labor. *I work at great depths. *I plunge head first into everything I do. *I do not get weekends or public holidays off. *I work in a damp environment. *I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. *I work in high temperatures. *My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
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"To be a good Promoter you must have the heart of a Gambler and the mind of a Computer"
