Daeveed wrote: @ElRep: In general i don't expect a thank you for my good deeds, but in the context we're talking, the man should not be the only one put to test. By expecting a thank you, the man should perceive if the girl has (at least) good manners or not.
I agree a women should always say thank you even if its ten times in a row its only common politeness!! I know i dont expect anyone to open the car door or the front door or the back door, its a nice jester and i always say thank you! Orale always opens the door for me and he gets a kiss(lol) and mind you we have been together a year now and he still acts like a gentleman! SO Dogo i think she was just being a SNOTTY LITTLE BIATCH cuz had she truly been a lady she would of opened the second door! and not waited and expected you to do it! what is she armless she cant open a friggen door!
No she wasn't armless. If she was I would've taken her for a Slurpy, NOT dinner
Daeveed wrote: @ElRep: In general i don't expect a thank you for my good deeds, but in the context we're talking, the man should not be the only one put to test. By expecting a thank you, the man should perceive if the girl has (at least) good manners or not.
I agree a women should always say thank you even if its ten times in a row its only common politeness!! I know i dont expect anyone to open the car door or the front door or the back door, its a nice jester and i always say thank you! Orale always opens the door for me and he gets a kiss(lol) and mind you we have been together a year now and he still acts like a gentleman! SO Dogo i think she was just being a SNOTTY LITTLE BIATCH cuz had she truly been a lady she would of opened the second door! and not waited and expected you to do it! what is she armless she cant open a friggen door!
No she wasn't armless. If she was I would've taken her for a Slurpy, NOT dinner
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Daeveed wrote: @ElRep: In general i don't expect a thank you for my good deeds, but in the context we're talking, the man should not be the only one put to test. By expecting a thank you, the man should perceive if the girl has (at least) good manners or not.
I agree a women should always say thank you even if its ten times in a row its only common politeness!! I know i dont expect anyone to open the car door or the front door or the back door, its a nice jester and i always say thank you! Orale always opens the door for me and he gets a kiss(lol) and mind you we have been together a year now and he still acts like a gentleman! SO Dogo i think she was just being a SNOTTY LITTLE BIATCH cuz had she truly been a lady she would of opened the second door! and not waited and expected you to do it! what is she armless she cant open a friggen door!
To me it's simple. I take the initiative by being a gentleman and I open doors, and pay bills and whatever. If the woman doesn't thank me for what i did, next time I don't do it. I'll do it again the time after that. If she doesn't thank me again, I don't do it ever again.
You Shouldn’t Expect A Thank You For Good Deeds . . .
* If She Doesn’t Have Manners, That’s Her Own Problem *
Of course you should get a thank you for a good deed. Like Daeveed said, it's only good manners.
Good deeds should not be REWARDED by monetary items. but that's another thread.
@ElRep: In general i don't expect a thank you for my good deeds, but in the context we're talking, the man should not be the only one put to test. By expecting a thank you, the man should perceive if the girl has (at least) good manners or not.
To me it's simple. I take the initiative by being a gentleman and I open doors, and pay bills and whatever. If the woman doesn't thank me for what i did, next time I don't do it. I'll do it again the time after that. If she doesn't thank me again, I don't do it ever again.
You Shouldn’t Expect A Thank You For Good Deeds . . .
* If She Doesn’t Have Manners, That’s Her Own Problem *
To me it's simple. I take the initiative by being a gentleman and I open doors, and pay bills and whatever. If the woman doesn't thank me for what i did, next time I don't do it. I'll do it again the time after that. If she doesn't thank me again, I don't do it ever again.
I think a man should always try to be a gentleman at all times. Granted, there are times when a man cannot fulfill his courteous 'duties' because it is not feasible, it is awkward or it is too inconvenient. I think a woman should be understanding during these situations and appreciative at all other times.
Being chivalrous is not silly because it is voluntary. A man is chivalrous because in the end it makes him feel good.
Sonny: Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her. Calogero 'C' Anello: Just like that? Sonny: Listen to me, kid. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast.
I know the movie, but not the name..... I tried it , biatch didnt pass.
The divorce proceedings had been long, contentious, and extremely heated.
Finally, the husband's attorney rose for one last try at a no-alimony settlement.
"Your Honor," he said, "my client sincerely believes his wife is just being ridiculous. Why, most women would love to have a husband who still believes in chivalry and on the day in question, he was only opening the door for her out of chivalry."
"Counselor," replied the judge, "I am granting the divorce and the settlement Mrs. Smith is asking in its entirely. I simply cannot believe chivalry was the motivation for your client opening that car door - while he was driving down the freeway at 65 mph."
LB wrote: Culturally speaking.....(in the middle east) a man will NOT ever allow the woman to pay.....even now in days....and if she brings her friends or family...HE pays for everything and all the time.....WHY? that's the culture.....it has been done generation through generation.....it makes them feel more of a man..... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is true.
I think Dogo has the perfect balance. I dont expect guys to open car doors and stuff, although nothing wrong with it. As for picking up the tab, nothing wrong with taking turns or going dutch. Also, in the sense of buying drinks, a lot of my guy friends are very nice this way. If we see each other at a club or whatever, they usually get me a drink, and I usually buy them one in return as well.
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Opening the doors though is a MUST.....for me a guy that fails this test on the first date will not get a second.....ademas, esa misma noche lo dejo plantado......and it's not my job to teach him......
Does Anyone Recognize This ? ? ?
* What A Great Movie *
Sonny: Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her. Calogero 'C' Anello: Just like that? Sonny: Listen to me, kid. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast.
My Gf Always Opens My Door After I Let Her In . . .
ummm.....Boyz 'n the hood? LOL
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Opening the doors though is a MUST.....for me a guy that fails this test on the first date will not get a second.....ademas, esa misma noche lo dejo plantado......and it's not my job to teach him......
Does Anyone Recognize This ? ? ?
* What A Great Movie *
Sonny: Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her. Calogero 'C' Anello: Just like that? Sonny: Listen to me, kid. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast.
My Gf Always Opens My Door After I Let Her In . . .
I do think it has a lot to do with the woman's down to earth-ness though
No....sori ah!
Being down to earth has nothing to do with that extent of Chivalry.....
You find it "silly" because you were not brought up with it....you haven't practiced it and I bet you dad doesn't do that for your mom either.....
He doesn't NOW, not sure if he USED to do it (I think it's pretty normal for a married couple to grow out of that over time though)
The bill paying scenario has a lot to do with women working now in days.....so once in a while they feel the need to pay or think it's proper or fair......
Culturally speaking.....(in the middle east) a man will NOT ever allow the woman to pay.....even now in days....and if she brings her friends or family...HE pays for everything and all the time.....WHY? that's the culture.....it has been done generation through generation.....it makes them feel more of a man.....
For me (personally) I sometimes like it when a guy opens the car door for me.....SOMETIMES......it's not a must and I won't get upset if he doesn't......like it's not that much of a big deal....it's just nice, especially when my hands are full.....
Opening the doors though is a MUST.....for me a guy that fails this test on the first date will not get a second.....ademas, esa misma noche lo dejo plantado......and it's not my job to teach him......
But I DO! lol! the scenario was this: I opened the first door, the second door is about two yards away.. she gets in, walks the two yards and waits there in front of the door, for me to let the first door go, walk the two yards past her to open the second door That makes ME feel like a slave, NOT a gentelman And actually find it mildly disrespectful to me as a PERSON not a man
Chivalry (to me) has a lot to do with the extent of RESPECT and attention a man shows a lady.....because at the end of the day.....that's all we really want.....
A real lady demands to be treated as such.....this doesn't make her less down to earth.
Treat a lady like one and she'll treat you like the real man that you are.....
DO I KNOW THIS PERSON??
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I do think it has a lot to do with the woman's down to earth-ness though
No....sori ah!
Being down to earth has nothing to do with that extent of Chivalry.....
You find it "silly" because you were not brought up with it....you haven't practiced it and I bet you dad doesn't do that for your mom either.....
He doesn't NOW, not sure if he USED to do it (I think it's pretty normal for a married couple to grow out of that over time though)
The bill paying scenario has a lot to do with women working now in days.....so once in a while they feel the need to pay or think it's proper or fair......
Culturally speaking.....(in the middle east) a man will NOT ever allow the woman to pay.....even now in days....and if she brings her friends or family...HE pays for everything and all the time.....WHY? that's the culture.....it has been done generation through generation.....it makes them feel more of a man.....
For me (personally) I sometimes like it when a guy opens the car door for me.....SOMETIMES......it's not a must and I won't get upset if he doesn't......like it's not that much of a big deal....it's just nice, especially when my hands are full.....
Opening the doors though is a MUST.....for me a guy that fails this test on the first date will not get a second.....ademas, esa misma noche lo dejo plantado......and it's not my job to teach him......
But I DO! lol! the scenario was this: I opened the first door, the second door is about two yards away.. she gets in, walks the two yards and waits there in front of the second door, for me to let the first door go, walk the two yards past her to open the second door That makes ME feel like a slave, NOT a gentelman And actually find it mildly disrespectful to me as a PERSON not a man
Chivalry (to me) has a lot to do with the extent of RESPECT and attention a man shows a lady.....because at the end of the day.....that's all we really want.....
A real lady demands to be treated as such.....this doesn't make her less down to earth.
Treat a lady like one and she'll treat you like the real man that you are.....
-- Edited by Dogo at 00:59, 2006-08-18
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
I do think it has a lot to do with the woman's down to earth-ness though
No....sori ah!
Being down to earth has nothing to do with that extent of Chivalry.....
You find it "silly" because you were not brought up with it....you haven't practiced it and I bet you dad doesn't do that for your mom either.....
The bill paying scenario has a lot to do with women working now in days.....so once in a while they feel the need to pay or think it's proper or fair......
Culturally speaking.....(in the middle east) a man will NOT ever allow the woman to pay.....even now in days....and if she brings her friends or family...HE pays for everything and all the time.....WHY? that's the culture.....it has been done generation through generation.....it makes them feel more of a man.....
For me (personally) I sometimes like it when a guy opens the car door for me.....SOMETIMES......it's not a must and I won't get upset if he doesn't......like it's not that much of a big deal....it's just nice, especially when my hands are full.....
Opening the doors though is a MUST.....for me a guy that fails this test on the first date will not get a second.....ademas, esa misma noche lo dejo plantado......and it's not my job to teach him......
Chivalry (to me) has a lot to do with the extent of RESPECT and attention a man shows a lady.....because at the end of the day.....that's all we really want.....
A real lady demands to be treated as such.....this doesn't make her less down to earth.
Treat a lady like one and she'll treat you like the real man that you are.....
__________________
"To be a good Promoter you must have the heart of a Gambler and the mind of a Computer"
Actually, next time on a date........ I'll just stand by the driver door and look like I have no clue how to get in, and give her the "Hellooo? pfffft!.. can you open my door?" look
LMAO
I sooo wanna be there to see that. Can I come???? Please???
I promise to open my own door
LOL
Sure. YOu can do that just after you open MY door
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Actually, next time on a date........ I'll just stand by the driver door and look like I have no clue how to get in, and give her the "Hellooo? pfffft!.. can you open my door?" look
LMAO
I sooo wanna be there to see that. Can I come???? Please???
Well, it's not that I NEVER do it If I HAVE to walk by the passenger door then I'll do it, comfortably But if I have to purposely walk around the car to open the door because she looks helpless and like she has no clue how to get into a car, then I do it, but I'm sure I'm dragging my feet during the process
Funny thing is, I do it more comfortably for female FRIENDS, not dates.., wonder why that is
its your comfort level hun.... you're more at ease with your female friends and theres no expectations or that initial weirdness when you first start seeing someone.
I say this... if chicky doenst open the door, walk to her side, tap on the window and motion that you'll meet her inside.... she'll open her own door then...
LOL...
Actually, next time on a date........ I'll just stand by the driver door and look like I have no clue how to get in, and give her the "Hellooo? pfffft!.. can you open my door?" look
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Well, it's not that I NEVER do it If I HAVE to walk by the passenger door then I'll do it, comfortably But if I have to purposely walk around the car to open the door because she looks helpless and like she has no clue how to get into a car, then I do it, but I'm sure I'm dragging my feet during the process
Funny thing is, I do it more comfortably for female FRIENDS, not dates.., wonder why that is
its your comfort level hun.... you're more at ease with your female friends and theres no expectations or that initial weirdness when you first start seeing someone.
I say this... if chicky doenst open the door, walk to her side, tap on the window and motion that you'll meet her inside.... she'll open her own door then...
OH! pffft!! I got suaveness, baby! Just not when opening the car door.... I feel, and probably look, like a dork doing it
lol... then dont do it. Trust me, we women can tell when a man is a seasoned pro at these things. But to avoid any weirdness for you, just dont do it... let her open her own car door and door-doors.
Well, it's not that I NEVER do it If I HAVE to walk by the passenger door then I'll do it, comfortably But if I have to purposely walk around the car to open the door because she looks helpless and like she has no clue how to get into a car, then I do it, but I'm sure I'm dragging my feet during the process
Funny thing is, I do it more comfortably for female FRIENDS, not dates.., wonder why that is
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OH! pffft!! I got suaveness, baby! Just not when opening the car door.... I feel, and probably look, like a dork doing it
lol... then dont do it. Trust me, we women can tell when a man is a seasoned pro at these things. But to avoid any weirdness for you, just dont do it... let her open her own car door and door-doors.
Jaime Cruz wrote: If you aim low you won't have that problem
sooo wrong and yet sooo funny!
@ Dogo: Believing in equality doesnt mean that a women doesnt want to be treated right. I personally am a super strong believer in equal rights, but I have no reservation letting a man pick up the tab, or buy me a fur coat, or even pay my credit card/telephone/cell phone/cable/car/insurance bills... Im just well rounded that way.
To answer your question though, some men were brought up doing those 'silly' things and feel completely comfortable doing them... but its when men feel forced to do these actions that they seem silly and out of place and even out of character for him. If you dont feel comfortable doing it, then just dont! You'll seem like a dorkus if you do... cuz you wont do it right and with suaveness.
As for the picking up of the tab, well thats kind of a grey area. Not every man has pockets like Jay Z... so we women cant really expect a man to pay for us ALL the time, just most of the time However, if the man is trying to court/get with the lady, then hell yah... you boys better pony out the dough. lol
OH! pffft!! I got suaveness, baby! Just not when opening the car door.... I feel, and probably look, like a dork doing it
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
Jaime Cruz wrote: If you aim low you won't have that problem
sooo wrong and yet sooo funny!
@ Dogo: Believing in equality doesnt mean that a women doesnt want to be treated right. I personally am a super strong believer in equal rights, but I have no reservation letting a man pick up the tab, or buy me a fur coat, or even pay my credit card/telephone/cell phone/cable/car/insurance bills... Im just well rounded that way.
To answer your question though, some men were brought up doing those 'silly' things and feel completely comfortable doing them... but its when men feel forced to do these actions that they seem silly and out of place and even out of character for him. If you dont feel comfortable doing it, then just dont! You'll seem like a dorkus if you do... cuz you wont do it right and with suaveness.
As for the picking up of the tab, well thats kind of a grey area. Not every man has pockets like Jay Z... so we women cant really expect a man to pay for us ALL the time, just most of the time However, if the man is trying to court/get with the lady, then hell yah... you boys better pony out the dough. lol
PS. I vote that Dogo take me out on a date and be made to open each and every door that we come across. And we should go on a first date to a door factory... Im sure he'll have a ball
I was just reading the "feminist" thread (or whatever) and this came to mind:
Nowadays, is chivalry, to a certain extent, just plain silly? Do modern women really expect that anymore? Is it about REAL "equality" or just where/when convenient?
I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant. Pay the bill, let the lady walk in first, open the door, yadda yada However, I just feel incredibly silly to do certain things, or to do certain things ALL the time! For example, I feel incredibly silly opening the car door for a woman, I mean it’s a friggin CAR DOOR!!! I can’t HELP but feel ridiculous doing it!... or pay the bill ALL the time!!.. or pull out her chair at the restaurant so she can sit?!... NEVER! (Unless it guarantees some action, LOL)
I went on a date with this girl a few months back that had this type of attitude She got to the car door and just sort of stood there, waiting. Same thing at the restaurant.. BOTH restaurant doors!
Is it just me? And do women really expect this kind of treatment anymore? As I said, I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant, but some things just seem plain silly
Discuss
I think you are a gentleman for how u have described urself,.but about the car door,. and the chair,. etc,. well nowdays,. I think that women who expect that is kind of "fifi" or she thinks that she is SO high level that she needs that,. probably to feed her ego of woman,.. about the paying the bill ,. it will depend on the type of relationship you want,. for example,. if it s the first date,. yes,. I expect the man to pay ,. if than nothing else happen,. and we remind friends,.so then I will pay either the total or my part,. and then if we become something more so then 50% 50%,. I do expect the man to be a gentleman,. but I open the car door,. and other doors as well,. I can pull my chair,. I woman knows if the man has manners or no,.
Agreed
BTW, when i mention the bill..... I still pay almost all the time, but I think it's nice to hear the woman OFFER to pay, I almost never accept, and her gesture alone makes me happier to pay (does that make any sense?)
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
I was just reading the "feminist" thread (or whatever) and this came to mind:
Nowadays, is chivalry, to a certain extent, just plain silly? Do modern women really expect that anymore? Is it about REAL "equality" or just where/when convenient?
I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant. Pay the bill, let the lady walk in first, open the door, yadda yada However, I just feel incredibly silly to do certain things, or to do certain things ALL the time! For example, I feel incredibly silly opening the car door for a woman, I mean it’s a friggin CAR DOOR!!! I can’t HELP but feel ridiculous doing it!... or pay the bill ALL the time!!.. or pull out her chair at the restaurant so she can sit?!... NEVER! (Unless it guarantees some action, LOL)
I went on a date with this girl a few months back that had this type of attitude She got to the car door and just sort of stood there, waiting. Same thing at the restaurant.. BOTH restaurant doors!
Is it just me? And do women really expect this kind of treatment anymore? As I said, I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant, but some things just seem plain silly
Discuss
I think you are a gentleman for how u have described urself,.but about the car door,. and the chair,. etc,. well nowdays,. I think that women who expect that is kind of "fifi" or she thinks that she is SO high level that she needs that,. probably to feed her ego of woman,.. about the paying the bill ,. it will depend on the type of relationship you want,. for example,. if it s the first date,. yes,. I expect the man to pay ,. if than nothing else happen,. and we remind friends,.so then I will pay either the total or my part,. and then if we become something more so then 50% 50%,. I do expect the man to be a gentleman,. but I open the car door,. and other doors as well,. I can pull my chair,. I woman knows if the man has manners or no,.
Jaime Cruz wrote: If you aim low you won't have that problem
I think there are certain things that are never gonna go out of style, such as the good manners and how to be a proper gentleman....
We have to be inteligent in who we "invest" all this little details to... there are certain women that don't even notice this attentions and those are the ones that should get treated at a more "equal level".... make them pay their bills, open their own doors, grab a tit goodnight, etc...
Good answer BTW
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
Jaime Cruz wrote: If you aim low you won't have that problem
I think there are certain things that are never gonna go out of style, such as the good manners and how to be a proper gentleman....
We have to be inteligent in who we "invest" all this little details to... there are certain women that don't even notice this attentions and those are the ones that should get treated at a more "equal level".... make them pay their bills, open their own doors, grab a tit goodnight, etc...
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I was just reading the "feminist" thread (or whatever) and this came to mind:
Nowadays, is chivalry, to a certain extent, just plain silly? Do modern women really expect that anymore? Is it about REAL "equality" or just where/when convenient?
I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant. Pay the bill, let the lady walk in first, open the door, yadda yada However, I just feel incredibly silly to do certain things, or to do certain things ALL the time! For example, I feel incredibly silly opening the car door for a woman, I mean it’s a friggin CAR DOOR!!! I can’t HELP but feel ridiculous doing it!... or pay the bill ALL the time!!.. or pull out her chair at the restaurant so she can sit?!... NEVER! (Unless it guarantees some action, LOL)
I went on a date with this girl a few months back that had this type of attitude She got to the car door and just sort of stood there, waiting. Same thing at the restaurant.. BOTH restaurant doors!
Is it just me? And do women really expect this kind of treatment anymore? As I said, I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant, but some things just seem plain silly
Discuss
If you aim low you won't have that problem
As in the "quality" of women?
Not necesarily. The person I'm seeing now is nothing like that, and she's far from "low aim" material I do think it has a lot to do with the woman's down to earth-ness though
-- Edited by Dogo at 22:11, 2006-08-17
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
I was just reading the "feminist" thread (or whatever) and this came to mind:
Nowadays, is chivalry, to a certain extent, just plain silly? Do modern women really expect that anymore? Is it about REAL "equality" or just where/when convenient?
I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant. Pay the bill, let the lady walk in first, open the door, yadda yada However, I just feel incredibly silly to do certain things, or to do certain things ALL the time! For example, I feel incredibly silly opening the car door for a woman, I mean it’s a friggin CAR DOOR!!! I can’t HELP but feel ridiculous doing it!... or pay the bill ALL the time!!.. or pull out her chair at the restaurant so she can sit?!... NEVER! (Unless it guarantees some action, LOL)
I went on a date with this girl a few months back that had this type of attitude She got to the car door and just sort of stood there, waiting. Same thing at the restaurant.. BOTH restaurant doors!
Is it just me? And do women really expect this kind of treatment anymore? As I said, I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant, but some things just seem plain silly
I was just reading the "feminist" thread (or whatever) and this came to mind:
Nowadays, is chivalry, to a certain extent, just plain silly? Do modern women really expect that anymore? Is it about REAL "equality" or just where/when convenient?
I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant. Pay the bill, let the lady walk in first, open the door, yadda yada However, I just feel incredibly silly to do certain things, or to do certain things ALL the time! For example, I feel incredibly silly opening the car door for a woman, I mean it’s a friggin CAR DOOR!!! I can’t HELP but feel ridiculous doing it!... or pay the bill ALL the time!!.. or pull out her chair at the restaurant so she can sit?!... NEVER! (Unless it guarantees some action, LOL)
I went on a date with this girl a few months back that had this type of attitude She got to the car door and just sort of stood there, waiting. Same thing at the restaurant.. BOTH restaurant doors!
Is it just me? And do women really expect this kind of treatment anymore? As I said, I’d like to think I’m pretty gallant, but some things just seem plain silly
Discuss
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.