Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.
After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night .....whether you're here or not."
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.
After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement.
He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.
One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well.
He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?'
His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
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A person who doesn't make mistakes is unlikely to make anything.
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At > >> >>>one house, it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no > >> >>>answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. > >> >>> > >> >>>Therefore, he took out a business card and wrote, "Revelation > >> >>>3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door. > >> >>> > >> >>>When > >>the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found > >> >>>that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic > >> >>>message, "Genesis 3:10." Reaching for his Bible to check out the > >> >>>citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. > >> >>> > >> >>>Revelation 3:20 begins, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock." > >> >>> Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was > >> >>>afraid for I was naked."
