cualquier posición es buena si se la disfruta entre las dos personas.. :wink en mi opinión, hacer la parabólica humana y aburrirme de lo complicado no tiene sentido.. mejor algo mas facil, divertido y con acción! LOL
:woof: :woof:
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Not everything I post or say on foro are necesarily true facts. <- THAT is a fact! :blankstare:
cualquier posición es buena si se la disfruta entre las dos personas.. :wink en mi opinión, hacer la parabólica humana y aburrirme de lo complicado no tiene sentido.. mejor algo mas facil, divertido y con acción! LOL
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"Si alguien tiene dificultades para darte una sonrisa......dale la tuya"
OOOOppps, I walked into a wrong thread: I assumed this had to do with job related position (manager, supervisor, assistant manager, secretary, etc, etc!)
PERVS!!!
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Not everything I post or say on foro are necesarily true facts. <- THAT is a fact! :blankstare:
XXX wrote: Motown Junkie wrote: WTF???!!!!! I HATE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!! WARN ME WARN ME WARN ME!!!!!!!!!!!! warn you about what??/ I've said this about a thousand times (although I believe you don't log on often) but my monitor faces EVERYBODY behind me so it's kind of embarassing when I get caught staring at half naked broads or kama sutra positions!!! I've never scrolled so fast in my life!!!!!!!!!!
Motown Junkie wrote: WTF???!!!!! I HATE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!! WARN ME WARN ME WARN ME!!!!!!!!!!!! warn you about what??/
I've said this about a thousand times (although I believe you don't log on often) but my monitor faces EVERYBODY behind me so it's kind of embarassing when I get caught staring at half naked broads or kama sutra positions!!!
I've never scrolled so fast in my life!!!!!!!!!!
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Knock people down at their own expense, they'll take it as a compliment!!!!
Kama Sutra love making [Publishing date: 02.04.2003 10:23]
The sitting on the toilet (difficulty rating : 10/10)
How to do it You lie on your back with your knees drawn up, as though preparing to do that "bicycling in the air" routine gym teachers were, strangely so keen on. She squats down on your penis and lifts herself up and down to provide the action.
Benefits for him If you have any weird "submission" fantasies (Danny), then this hits the bullseye, without the need for expensive handcuffs or cattle prods.
Benefits for her She gets to set the pace, and your (hopefully washed and trimmed) toenails can scratch softly on her spine.
Disadvantages You need to have a long, flexible old fella to manage this one, so anyone nicknamed "Peewee" can forget it. Plus, if she loses her balance, someone is going to end up at the...
The sure-footed shower (difficulty rating : 5/10)
How to do it For slap and tickle under hot sprays of water, don't just stand in the tub and go at it - this is a recipe for nasty slippage. Instead, get your lady to lean her back against the tile, bracing her feet against the far rim of the bath. You then slot in between her legs, and she makes things extra stable by clinging to your shoulders.
Benefits for him Three words: "soapy tit sex".
Benefits for her If her man usually stinks like an unwashed hippo, then she can combine sex with a lesson in hygiene.
Disadvantages This doesn't work in a separate shower cubicle. And you need to have water pressure, or it feels no sexier than being dribbled on by a cretinous giant.
The banging of the wall (difficulty rating : 2/10)
How to do it Once she's warmed up and fancies a vigorous shafting, shuffle yourselves up near the top of the bed. As she lies with her legs open, grip the headboard and use the leverage to deliver deep, piston-like thrusts. She can regulate these by wrapping her legs around your bum and "pulling" you in.
Benefits for him Less exhausting on the forearms than normal missionary style, and if you're strong enough you can even free up a hand to stroke her tits. Also ideal for pissing off your neighbours, as the headboard whacks the wall with every stroke.
Benefits for her Deep penetration. She can be lazy. If you throw in a pair of shoes this will fulfil all her criteria for the perfect sexual encounter.
Disadvantages Will leave tell-tale scratches on your wallpaper, which are embarrassing if Mum comes round.
The hoovering of the floor (difficulty rating : 9/10)
How to do it Stand behind her then lift her up by her thighs, pulling her back onto your cock while she supports herself on her hands. Next, "walk" her round the room like a wheelbarrow while shagging, possibly saying things like, "Look at the state of this carpet, you lazy cow."
Benefits for him Easy to give her butt cheeks a playful slap while doing this one, although if you attempt anything too Cozy Powell, you may lose your grip and drop her.
Benefits for her Better than a Jane Fonda workout, and the real show off can crawl towards the wall and "walk" up it like a fleshy Spiderman.
Disadvantages Not to be attempted if you have any of these on your floor: broken glass, cockroaches, splinters.
The playing of the cello (difficulty rating : 9/10)
How to do it Once you've provided her with a cushion to bring her pussy up to the right height, she lies on her back and props her ankles on one of your shoulders. You cling onto her shins, thus giving you extra purchase for your thrusts, and use your spare hand to tease her budding nipples.
Benefits for him Holding her legs together will make her muff "grip" your cock a lot tighter, which could be handy if her nickname is "windsock". You can also lean on her legs if you get knackered, as long as you don't piledrive your whole weight, and it's easy to switch to anal sex without any complicated clambering around.
Benefits for her She can't see your fat gut. And you can spend time stroking the backs of her thighs and calves - and nibble her toes - during the cello action.
Disadvantages If she's not very supple, this might hurt, so only attempt it with ballerinas, gymnasts and girls who did well in gym class. Plus it's almost impossible to stimulate her clitoris like this, so make sure that she's well warmed up beforehand
The defiling of the alleyway (difficulty rating : 3/10)
How to do it The ideal position for "quickie" encounters in a variety of exciting situations including train toilets, telephone boxes or that place round the back of restaurants where they keep the bins, because neither of you has to lie on the ground amidst all the grime and litter. Essentially, she leans against the wall and grips her legs around your thighs, while you busily pump away.
Benefits for him Primaeval stuff, with the fear of discovery by a greasy Italian waiter sneaking out for a sly fag break, meaning that no time has to be wasted on niceties or foreplay. Just plug yourself in and bury your face in her neck.
Benefits for her She gets to feel your strong muscled body ravishing her. This happens a lot in soppy romantic novels featuring characters called "Sir Rodney", so it's probably a big sexual fantasy of her's.
Disadvantages If you don't have a strong muscled body, you're quickly going to collapse in a wheezing, bronchitic heap. And she won't thank you if the back of her favourite blouse gets covered in pigeon droppings.
Immitiating the Wolkswgen logo (Polo Playa - when you want to play) (difficulty rating : 6/10)
How to do it You lie back while she rides you, cowgirl style. Then, using her hands to steady herself, she lifts one leg over your body and begins to turn sideways. She carries on rotating, stopping at each point of the compass for a few thrusts until she's gone full circle.
Benefits for him You get a unique corkscrew feeling on your cock while she turns around, and - like one of those "multiple" postcards from a holiday resort - you get a full view of all the goodies she's got.
Benefits for her She needs to be very nimble and very wet to manage this. And it's best to hold onto her in case she slips, doing you a very nasty injury in the process.
Disadvantages If she's been packing away the Swiss Rolls lately, you may be left feeling as though you've just been raped by an elephant.
The kneeling of the rifleman (difficulty rating : 2/10)
How to do it Similar to the conventional doggy style, your missus is on all fours and you're stationed behind her. However, you go up on one knee, with the result of raising the height of your tackle by about three inches. This could be crucial if you're a bit shorter than her.
Benefits for him All the advantages of doggy, but with the added bonus that you only get carpet burns on one leg.
Benefits for her If you're a shortarse, it'll stop you clambering all over her like a rodeo cowboy trying to stay on a very angry bull.
Disadvantages If your "kneeling leg" gets tired, you'll find you'll have to swap over. This is impossible to do without looking like you're attempting some kind of Shakin' Stevens routine.
The riding of the steer (difficulty rating : 1/10)
How to do it You make like the boy Tyson has just knocked you out sparko, and she squats on top of you facing away from your haed. Gripping your kneecaps, she lifts herself up and down, helping you "guiding" her by her bum and hair. The view should be tremendous.
Benefits for him All the advantages of doggy style, but without the carpet burns. You can easily finger her anus, and she can reach down to fondle your balls while she rides. Plus, you can make silly faces or fantasise that she's someone else without fear of discovery.
Benefits for her She can reach down and touch her clitoris, and angle the thrusts for maximum G-spot pleasure. She's also prety much in charge of speed and depth, which makes a nice change from you jabbing into her like an hungry woodpecker.
Disadvantages Can feel a bit impersonal if you get your jollies from eye contact. And it's a law that you have to keep saying how nice her arse looks.
The watching of the Grandstand(difficulty rating : 5/10)
How to do it Sitting in your favourite armchair, you allow your partner to mount you from the front. She pushes against the arms and back of the chair to get things moving, and you help things along a bit by lifting her back up and down.
Benefits for him It's easy to watch telly over her shoulders, and having her tits to play with will certainly enliven any dull nil-all draws at the Arsenal.
Benefits for her Your lips are at the perfect height to kiss her nipples, and because armchairs tend to be sturdy constructions, there are none of the "what if it collapses?" worries she might have when bouncing on a dining room chair.
Disadvantages It's impossible to touch her clitoris in this position. And sooner or later, you're going to get come stains and pussy juice all over your upholstery. If the design is a plain colour one, this will require an embarrassing trip to the dry cleaner.
The doggy loop (difficulty rating : 1/10)
How to do it The perfect method if you end up in bed with two women. One of them lies down on her back with her legs open. The other rests on all fours above her, facing the other way as though they were doing a 69. You then penetrate the second girl doggy style. As you screw, the first girl can lick your balls as they shuttle back and forth. It's best if the women have lesbian tendencies, as they can go down on each other simultaneously while you thrust.
Benefits for him ....duh!!! Great story afterwards! (hehe...)
Benefits for her*2 Lesbian tendencies while having fun the straight way as well.
Disadvantages ...none that we could think of...!
The sofa shag (difficulty rating : 1/10)
How to do it First, get a plastic water wing, of the sort used by nippers when they learn to seim. Next, infalte it and coat the inside with a generous slathering of Vaseline KY jelly. Thirdly, place it in between the cushion and the base of your sofa, holding it firmly in place by pressing down on the cushion from above. Finally kneel down until you're at the right height, unzip your flies and bang away at your favourite piece of furniture.
Benefits for him When she is away and the need comes over you can either get a trip down the pub and meet someone or save yourself the trip.
Benefits for her .....riiiight! hmmm he is not cheating on her with another woman????
Disadvantages Embrassing if caught in the act! (sneaz....Dannychew)
THIS THREAD IS TOO FUNNY!!! WITH ALL THE PERVS WE HAVE ON TH, I THOUGHT WE'D BE ON PAGE ALREADY!!! 
I've never scrolled so fast in my life!!!!!!!!!! 
