LITTLE TONY ON MATH

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a
fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls
on little TONY. He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the
first gunshot." The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like
your thinking."
Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU!
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice
cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose
the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one
with the wedding ring on," but I like your thinking."


LITTLE TONY ON MATH (Part 2)


Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in
arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father?
"The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'" I said "6", replies TONY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fakking difference?" asks the father"
That's what I said!"





LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH


Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we
are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an
example of a multi-syllable word?"
TONY says "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."



LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR


Little TONY was sitting in class one day.

All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled
out, Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"
The teacher replied, 'Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word
to use in this situation.
The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'
Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I
will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, *"You're an eight*,
but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"