this is soo very tru....believe it or not.. a lot of times costumbre can be even stronger then love..and alot of times couples are together because they are soo used to each other and they confuse that with love...but u should be with someone because u want to ..not because u feel that u NEED them..
Glam Girl, after people turn 30 there are not too many options (choices) so many people are married by them and that's when you think twice before breaking up, I mean when we are like 15 -29 we look our best and it's easier to be considered attractive by the opposite sex's ; believe me, that fades with time.
MAs vale lo viejo conocido que lo nuevo por conocer (most times). Claro que si viene Catherine Z Jones y se quiere casar conmigo bienvenida sea
Gitana wrote: IS IT ACTUAL LOVE OR IS IT THAT YOU ARE ACCUSTOMED TO HAVING THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE..... IF YOU WERE WITH YOUR OTHER HALF FOR QUITE A WHILE AND YOU REALIZED THAT YOU'RE JUST WITH HIM/HER BECAUSE YOU ARE USED TO THE PERSON.... WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM/HER AND REMAIN FRIENDS OR WOULD YOU CONTINUE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP..... OVER THE WEEKEND I BROUGHT UP THIS TOPIC AND I WAS AMAZED AT THE RESPONSES I GOT... JUST WANTED TO HEAR WHAT TH HAD TO SAY ABOUT THIS.... One way to find out is when the other person is not around for a while, then you'll have a clue if you miss his company or his love. Nadie sabe lo que tiene hasta que lo pierde. I'm older guy once told me that in order to have a lasting loving relationship it is necessary "La comprension" and not wait for the other person to be perfect and fulfill all your needs. On the other hand, I think love is a state of the mind, just like when you are a kid and want a toy, after a while you kind of get used to it and find other toys more attractive, you still play with your older toy though. So I think we have to be careful by not idealizing love, I think we tend to want "novelas" kind of love when we are younger, that's great if it happens, but even then, that kind of love also diminishes with time, thas when boyfriends start farting in front of their girlfriends, it doesn't mean they are not in love, is just another stage of the relationship. I mean, it would be unhealthy to hold farts all the time, once on a while they just gotto be released, rigth?.
I think its interesting that you finished off your statement with the "farting stage".
If your with some one because you are used to them, than its not fair to the other person. You are wasting their time, and your time. They can be with some one who truly loves them.. selfishness.. Now.. if there are kids involved, than its a very different story.
IS IT ACTUAL LOVE OR IS IT THAT YOU ARE ACCUSTOMED TO HAVING THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE..... IF YOU WERE WITH YOUR OTHER HALF FOR QUITE A WHILE AND YOU REALIZED THAT YOU'RE JUST WITH HIM/HER BECAUSE YOU ARE USED TO THE PERSON.... WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM/HER AND REMAIN FRIENDS OR WOULD YOU CONTINUE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP..... OVER THE WEEKEND I BROUGHT UP THIS TOPIC AND I WAS AMAZED AT THE RESPONSES I GOT... JUST WANTED TO HEAR WHAT TH HAD TO SAY ABOUT THIS....
One way to find out is when the other person is not around for a while, then you'll have a clue if you miss his company or his love. Nadie sabe lo que tiene hasta que lo pierde.
I'm older guy once told me that in order to have a lasting loving relationship it is necessary "La comprension" and not wait for the other person to be perfect and fulfill all your needs. On the other hand, I think love is a state of the mind, just like when you are a kid and want a toy, after a while you kind of get used to it and find other toys more attractive, you still play with your older toy though. So I think we have to be careful by not idealizing love, I think we tend to want "novelas" kind of love when we are younger, that's great if it happens, but even then, that kind of love also diminishes with time, thas when boyfriends start farting in front of their girlfriends, it doesn't mean they are not in love, is just another stage of the relationship. I mean, it would be unhealthy to hold farts all the time, once on a while they just gotto be released, rigth?.
Gitana wrote: PRECIOSA wrote: TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE...CARE FOR...HAVE A FRIENDSHIP WITH...HAVE GREAT INTIMACY WITH...SHOULD BE AN HONOUR... BEING WITH SOMEONE CAUSE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND THINKING THERE IS NO ONE BETTER OUT THERE IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO... I THINK LOVE IS SUCH A HARD THING TO FIND...WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE IT...HOLD ON TO IT...!!! TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE AND CARE FOR IN EVERY ASPECT IS GREAT.... SOME PEOPLE M,AY HAVE THAT AND NOT VALUE IT AT ALL!!! NOW A DAYS VALUE DOES NOT MEAN MUCH FOR OTHERS AND THOSE PEOPLE ARE CALLED SELFISH...!!!
SELFISH PEOPLE LIKE THAT ARE THE MOST UNHAPPIEST ONES..... THEY ARE NEVER SATISFIED WITH WHAT THEY HAVE....
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!
PRECIOSA wrote: TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE...CARE FOR...HAVE A FRIENDSHIP WITH...HAVE GREAT INTIMACY WITH...SHOULD BE AN HONOUR... BEING WITH SOMEONE CAUSE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND THINKING THERE IS NO ONE BETTER OUT THERE IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO... I THINK LOVE IS SUCH A HARD THING TO FIND...WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE IT...HOLD ON TO IT...!!! TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE AND CARE FOR IN EVERY ASPECT IS GREAT.... SOME PEOPLE M,AY HAVE THAT AND NOT VALUE IT AT ALL!!!
NOW A DAYS VALUE DOES NOT MEAN MUCH FOR OTHERS AND THOSE PEOPLE ARE CALLED SELFISH...!!!
From personal experience, I was used to my other half and realized that I did not love him but because we had a daughter the decision was actually harder to make.
I thought about it a lot and realized that if I chose to stay with him because of my daughter it wouldn’t be fair for anyone. There was no hope of trying to work things out because I wanted out, unfortunately we could not be friends because obviously he didn’t agree with the separation and up to this day we only talk about my daughter and that’s about it.
So, if there is no love, don’t continue with the relationship and if you can remain friends and only friends than good but also remember that if you remain friends than you have to make sure that it’s only friendship and not give him/her any hope that you might change your mind later.
TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE...CARE FOR...HAVE A FRIENDSHIP WITH...HAVE GREAT INTIMACY WITH...SHOULD BE AN HONOUR... BEING WITH SOMEONE CAUSE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND THINKING THERE IS NO ONE BETTER OUT THERE IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO... I THINK LOVE IS SUCH A HARD THING TO FIND...WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE IT...HOLD ON TO IT...!!!
TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE AND CARE FOR IN EVERY ASPECT IS GREAT....
SOME PEOPLE MAY HAVE THAT AND NOT VALUE IT AT ALL!!!
-- Edited by Gitana at 12:09, 2005-11-28
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!
PRECIOSA wrote: TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE...CARE FOR...HAVE A FRIENDSHIP WITH...HAVE GREAT INTIMACY WITH...SHOULD BE AN HONOUR... BEING WITH SOMEONE CAUSE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND THINKING THERE IS NO ONE BETTER OUT THERE IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO... I THINK LOVE IS SUCH A HARD THING TO FIND...WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE IT...HOLD ON TO IT...!!! Exactly what I was thinking… LOL
HAVING GREAT INTIMACY IS THE KEY TO A GREAT RELEATIONSHIP...
TO BE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE...CARE FOR...HAVE A FRIENDSHIP WITH...HAVE GREAT INTIMACY WITH...SHOULD BE AN HONOUR... BEING WITH SOMEONE CAUSE YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND THINKING THERE IS NO ONE BETTER OUT THERE IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO... I THINK LOVE IS SUCH A HARD THING TO FIND...WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE IT...HOLD ON TO IT...!!!
Exactly what I was thinking… LOL
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Not everything I post or say on foro are necesarily true facts. <- THAT is a fact! :blankstare:
I think is better if u end this relationship, cause this person may feel really strong about u, and is better 2 just remain friends then play with their feelings, cause if u do not feel the same way u are most likely 2 do something to hurt this person...
The question is ... would you feel the same way if kids were involved? The majority of the time ppl stay in loveless marriages for the sake of the children. Is this fair to either partner? Is this fair to the kids? Something else to think about. It's not easy to just walk up and leave someone when there are other ppl involved in the relationship. I WATCH DR. PHIL!!!!
YOu talking about me?!?!?!?
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"Most of us fall short much more by omission than by commission."
The question is ... would you feel the same way if kids were involved? The majority of the time ppl stay in loveless marriages for the sake of the children. Is this fair to either partner? Is this fair to the kids? Something else to think about. It's not easy to just walk up and leave someone when there are other ppl involved in the relationship. I WATCH DR. PHIL!!!!
Even if kids were involved, I wouldn't saty for the kids sake, at the end even the kids suffer, seeing you arguing, and at the end everybody should be happy
Being accostomed to someone shouldnt be your deciding factor in whether or not you would stay with a person. You should be with someone b/c there is a connection there, b/c you actually want to be with that person. If you stay with someone cuz youre accostomed, then youre just cheating yourself and the person youre with. Its better to be alone than to be with someone that youre lukewarm about. Wouldnt you want to feel passion and desire for someone, rather than just feel like, yah well might as well....
BEING WITH SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU LOVE THEM IS SUCH AN AMZING FEELING.... I AGREE WITH YOU WIFEY.... BETTER TO BE ALONE THAN PLAY WITH SOMEONES EMOTIONS!!
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!
Being accostomed to someone shouldnt be your deciding factor in whether or not you would stay with a person. You should be with someone b/c there is a connection there, b/c you actually want to be with that person. If you stay with someone cuz youre accostomed, then youre just cheating yourself and the person youre with. Its better to be alone than to be with someone that youre lukewarm about.
Wouldnt you want to feel passion and desire for someone, rather than just feel like, yah well might as well....
The question is ... would you feel the same way if kids were involved? The majority of the time ppl stay in loveless marriages for the sake of the children. Is this fair to either partner? Is this fair to the kids? Something else to think about. It's not easy to just walk up and leave someone when there are other ppl involved in the relationship. I WATCH DR. PHIL!!!!
I AGREE.... WHEN KIDS ARE INVOLVED IT'S NOT AS EASY TO JUST PICK UP AND LEAVE.... YOU WOULD HAVE MORE ISSUES TO DEAL WITH IN THE LONG RUN....
BUT IT WOULDN'T BE FAIR TO BE UNHAPPY WITH SOMEONE AND HAVE YOUR KIDS SEE THAT DAY AFTER DAY!!!!
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!
The question is ... would you feel the same way if kids were involved? The majority of the time ppl stay in loveless marriages for the sake of the children. Is this fair to either partner? Is this fair to the kids? Something else to think about. It's not easy to just walk up and leave someone when there are other ppl involved in the relationship.
Aveses es dificil el romper con la otra persona, y la costumbre es una muy mala decision por la cual uno se queda mas tiempo con esa persona, but sometimes specially when u've been together for a longest time u may feel that what you have is the best for you, and you don't even know if its love or not.
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Uno de los secretos de una vida feliz está
en darse constantemente pequeños gustos.
PERSONALLY.... I WOULDN'T STAY WITH A PERSON JUST BECAUSE I'M USED TO HAVING THEM AROUND.... I WOULD ONLY BE LEADING THAT PERSON ON.... THAT WOULD BE VERY SELFISH... AND I DON'T THINK THAT ANYBODY DESERVES TO BE TREATED THAT WAY.....
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!
Sometimes we stay with a person for the most strange needs/reasons we can feel protected, we are comfortable, because we feel alone, because we think after him/her there's nothing......
IS IT ACTUAL LOVE OR IS IT THAT YOU ARE ACCUSTOMED TO HAVING THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE..... IF YOU WERE WITH YOUR OTHER HALF FOR QUITE A WHILE AND YOU REALIZED THAT YOU'RE JUST WITH HIM/HER BECAUSE YOU ARE USED TO THE PERSON.... WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM/HER AND REMAIN FRIENDS OR WOULD YOU CONTINUE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP..... OVER THE WEEKEND I BROUGHT UP THIS TOPIC AND I WAS AMAZED AT THE RESPONSES I GOT... JUST WANTED TO HEAR WHAT TH HAD TO SAY ABOUT THIS....
I wouldn't stay with the person only becuase I am accustomed to them, I would stay with them either for love or if there is some feelings attached
-- Edited by Salsera de Corazon at 10:30, 2005-11-28
IS IT ACTUAL LOVE OR IS IT THAT YOU ARE ACCUSTOMED TO HAVING THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE.....
IF YOU WERE WITH YOUR OTHER HALF FOR QUITE A WHILE AND YOU REALIZED THAT YOU'RE JUST WITH HIM/HER BECAUSE YOU ARE USED TO THE PERSON.... WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM/HER AND REMAIN FRIENDS OR WOULD YOU CONTINUE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP.....
OVER THE WEEKEND I BROUGHT UP THIS TOPIC AND I WAS AMAZED AT THE RESPONSES I GOT... JUST WANTED TO HEAR WHAT TH HAD TO SAY ABOUT THIS....
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TO SOLVE THE HUMAN EQUATION, WE NEED TO ADD LOVE, SUBTRACT HATE, MULTIPLY GOOD, AND DIVIDE BETWEEN TRUTH AND ERROR!!