Julie wrote: But people change, events in life make you see things differently, isolation from your family and friends, your goals might turned up to be different after all, etc…
Absolutely right ...Isolation. Escucha la Cancion Separate Lives de Phil Collins.
As you said it before culture, race, religion is not the issue; the main problem is when both are not in the same page when both don't have or pursue the same Life Goals.
race shouldnt matter at all its all about love and stuff finding that one person who completes you and its kinda sad if certain people stated on this forum they only dated their race cuz it can also state something about u..
Well, love definitively has no boundaries and yes, you do in many ways marry your partner family.
But it all comes down to how well do you know and respect each other and how ready you are to fight for your couple and what you believe in as such?
Well from personal experience, I am not Latina but lived in Mexico for almost 10 years and got married there. I had a wonderful time, but unfortunately, today, our lives took different paths and believe me, Race and Culture had nothing to do with it (If it would, a least we would have had an excuse). We both have very loving families that had accepted us, from the beginning, for who we are, regardless of religion and ethnic background and which whom we are still in communication and very good terms.
But people change, events in life make you see things differently, isolation from your family and friends, your goals might turned up to be different after all, etc…
Relationship is a two way exchange so if both are not on the same page, it will not work and not because of race, culture and religion issues (at least it wasn’t for us) but because of lack of communication and understanding. This proves you more than anything that you are not ready yet to commit seriously to that person.
And yes, the world is changing and we need to accept it. If it appears that your second half is not from the same background as you, well take it as an extraordinary opportunity to discover new perspectives. Take the time to share and exchange, this will make you growth as a person and it doesn’t mean “que vas a perder tu raices”. If you’re comfortable with who you are, you will never get lost and/or forget where you are coming from.
__________________
A person who doesn't make mistakes is unlikely to make anything.
You have posed question that I have been pondering for years. I too am ready to settle down. My dream woman was always someone of a similar culture- that is latin american or even better-una chilena. However its never worked out. I had a long distance relationship with a girl from chile -met her down there. But she was unable to get a visa to stay here (grad student, family exiled to europe, father prominent lawyer and communist-all of which apparently made her bad risk for visa). That relationship, like all long distance relationships, eventually fizzled. I also had a very serious relationship with a beautiful columbian girl but her work transfered her to Miami (I almost moved there).
Anways, they have been my most profound realtionships because they were latinas. There something so sweet about being with someone of a similar background. To watch them talk with my mother in spanish, to be able to relate so easily without any explanations. To dream of raising children who too will carrry a way of life, values, culture into the world. The idea of family vactions back to where our relatives reside is a nice thought too. It seems to be about keeping a sacred connection. Especially if you have large and great family in another country like I do in Chile.
So the idea of settling down with some who has a hard a time making that connection is difficult- but not impossible. My sister married a black Jamacian. And right now they are having a hard time because of cultural clashes. We have accepted and welcomed him to the family but nevertheless many issues have risen between them. Marriage is tough sometimes - even under the best of circumstances. Throw in different cultures, language problems, conflicting priorities and you've really got your work cut out for you.
Because most of my friends are not latinos and I don't even look latino - I've had a hard time meeting latinas in Toronto. I usually end up dating non-latinas. They've been great, but, the relationship never seems to go as deep as the ones I've had with latinas (see above). Latinas seem to reach a part of my heart, my psyche, that non-latinas can't penetrate.
"In other words...racial/cultural issues are probably much easier to deal with when dating but does race/culture matter when it comes to marriage...(they do say that when you marry a person they marry their family aswell)" ------------- In a true mutual respectful relationship, there shouldn't be any barriers. Yes, it's hard to get his/her family to welcome you if they're very traditional, but sometimes if you care to keep this relationship, you will do what it takes to have your family love the person you want to be with.
They didn't stress this saying enough. 95% of the problems Mark and I have had are family related. We do manage to overcome all the cultural issues but it takes work.
Yes it's difficulty to be in a relationship of a different race and culture , but like any other relationship in order to work there must be good communication ,understanding and compromised . Please Remember we all belong to one race . "The Human Race "
"In other words...racial/cultural issues are probably much easier to deal with when dating but does race/culture matter when it comes to marriage...(they do say that when you marry a person they marry their family aswell)"
-------------
In a true mutual respectful relationship, there shouldn't be any barriers. Yes, it's hard to get his/her family to welcome you if they're very traditional, but sometimes if you care to keep this relationship, you will do what it takes to have your family love the person you want to be with.
__________________
The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
Alex Bello wrote: Personally not sure, i have never dated anyone that has not been latina. hummm I don't want to reveal how I know you- lmao but I could have sworn you dated a white girl.....no? Perhaps she was a white latina??
could had been a friend.
now we are talking about dating right?
__________________
AB
.::El Amor No Es Para Todos::. : El Amor Comienza Con Una Mirada, Crece Con Un Beso Y Muere Con Una Lagrima.
If u are happy with this person no matter what race he or she is u will make no matter what problems come up, even if the person is of your own race problems will still xist so if u are happy just do it and deal with the problems as them come along.....
For me Italians....ohhh boy ! they Melt me Like Crazy, it might me that My mum is Italian but ....ahhhhhh they do the trick Also Scottish/Irish/Brits ...they are Da Bomb !
I think you misunderstood the question panchito
__________________
CHI CHI CHI LE LE LE VIVA CHILE!!!!
Proud memeber and supporter of Delta Gamma B i t c h - orama Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved
This is a hard one! I would love to think that it doesn't matter. I have dated men from other cultures but they were nothing serious so it's hard to say if it would have worked or not. Would I get bored of having to translate and explain my culture over and over again....not sure.
I am generally attracted to South American men...it's the look....the accents....I just always fall for South American men so I don't think I'll ever have this problem.
__________________
CHI CHI CHI LE LE LE VIVA CHILE!!!!
Proud memeber and supporter of Delta Gamma B i t c h - orama Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved
Are you married yet? If you're not... run, save yourself, woman! It's too late for me. @ Lahtina Can you share some of your good and bad experiences with us?
Yeah I would like to know too, please edumacate us..and NO Me personally am not planning on getting married anytime soon....thanks for the heads up though...
Love can overcome many things but love gets complicated when marriage, kids, in-laws and religion begin to play a factor. When I was dating my now husband who is Muslim, we would go on about how when our kids were born we would teach them both religions and cultures (best of both worlds type thing) and at the time this seemed like the ideal way of raising our kids. Almost 10 years later, 2 kids later AND two old school in-laws later, our idea of how we should raise our kids has changed. It's more a battle to see who wins now rather than teaching them the best of both worlds.
I think that as society becomes more multi-cultural these challenges within families will only become greater. We have old school parents or in-laws that are very intent on keeping things the way things were done back home but not necessarily realizing that society calls for change. All of our cultures are slowly starting to fuse together and the sooner we embrace that, the sooner we can all live in a society without racism and discrimination.
I am a strong believer in cultural pride and cultural diversity but there is nothing wrong with learning from other cultures. My main problem and issue is when other ppl try and FORCE their beliefs and ideals on other ppl. Again, this will only create more dissention between people and peace will never be attained.
I take it as "love had no boundaries". If this is really a person that respect you and loves you for who you are, then race shouldn't be an issue. I wish we could find a civilization out of this world so that us humans can finally take a different approach on our similarities rather then our fifferences. Look at France..prime example of racial judgment. Now they're having street barbecues everywhere..lol
I am being the devils advocate here but...will our world become ONE race and culture? Will we become a mixed society, what will happen to our races/cultures? What about our cultural/racial Pride...as for the marriage part...there would probably be chaos in a household if a child is being taught 2 kinds of living...and i am sure one spouse will be more overthetop on their culture then the other..so isnt it a bit problematic? can love overcome that?
I take it as "love had no boundaries". If this is really a person that respect you and loves you for who you are, then race shouldn't be an issue. I wish we could find a civilization out of this world so that us humans can finally take a different approach on our similarities rather then our fifferences. Look at France..prime example of racial judgment. Now they're having street barbecues everywhere..lol
__________________
"Live the life that you love, so you can love the life that you live"
S.L.U.T *Support YOUR talent!*
Lets say someone is now ready to settle down and is looking seriously into finding that person.
They find someone that is good to them and is generally a good person in society but they are not of the same culture nor race.
The person who was looking in the first place is stuck in a hard place because...although they know this person is a good person for them, they also think about the future and want to have that cultural/racial familiarity and raise a family within that type of familiarity/environment....
In other words...racial/cultural issues are probably much easier to deal with when dating but does race/culture matter when it comes to marriage...(they do say that when you marry a person they marry their family aswell)
Well, love definitively has no boundaries and yes, you do in many ways marry your partner family. 
"Most of us fall short much more by omission than by commission."
"Live the life that you love, so you can love the life that you live"
S.L.U.T *Support YOUR talent!*
