Are you really a man if.....

El Duro · Foro Master

RE: Are you really a man if.....

El Duro · Foro Master

Planned sort off I was 18 when my son was born. And no I aint together with her, she a crazy b I t c h

DannyC · Guru

lol my bad what a tounge twister

what i ment to say was ....were ur children planned? r u still with the baby mom/dad ?

see one person responded already lol

LGigolo · Comandante

X4v13r wrote:

DannyC wrote:

alright quick question to all u single moms or dads if u dont mind me asking

were ur children planned? were u with the girl/man at the time? r u still with them?

i don't get ur question, how can they still be with them if they are SINGLE parents

~X

I don't think he realized what he was saying... lol.

Colombiana4Life · Foro Master

DannyC wrote:

alright quick question to all u single moms or dads if u dont mind me asking

were ur children planned? were u with the girl/man at the time? r u still with them?

First one was not planned but what a beautiful surprise. Second one was planned. They are both blessings for me. The father and I have not been together for over two years now.

-- Edited by Colombiana4Life at 10:52, 2008-08-08

X4v13r · Comandante

DannyC wrote:

alright quick question to all u single moms or dads if u dont mind me asking

were ur children planned? were u with the girl/man at the time? r u still with them?

i don't get ur question, how can they still be with them if they are SINGLE parents weirdface

~X

DannyC · Guru

alright quick question to all u single moms or dads if u dont mind me asking

were ur children planned? were u with the girl/man at the time? r u still with them?

Chilenita · Comandante

My bro has been raising his daughter ALONE since she was 1 1/2 .....he doesn't get a penny from his ex...she has no money. As a mother I don't understand how a)you can give up custody of your daughter and B) not worry about helping provide for her. Luckily he doesn't need it but that is besides the point. NO FU CKING SHAME I TELL YOU

Dogo · Comandante

Colombiana4Life wrote:

Dogo wrote:

Yeah.. no. I totally do not understand. That is plain immature, and I don't think there's any room for childish, impulsive accions/decisions when it comes to choosing what is best for your kids... IMO

I've been through some rough times with my baby's mama (granted, short lived) but I wouldn't in a million years deny him to see his mom,no matter how much I couldn't stand her or how much money she didn't give me (and vice versa, I'd hope) He doesn't deserve it, AND who am I to make that decision for him?
If I think his mom doesn't deserve to see him ,that is just MY opinion, not the child's. He can build his own opinion of his mom when he gains enough reason to do so.
Meanwhile, I will fight with her for financial support (or whatever) on a different level, away from my kid/s.
Even the going to the courts sucks, but I guess it just takes ONE unreasonable parent to get that ball rolling, and I guess sometimes there's just no choice, I agree

-- Edited by Dogo at 20:55, 2008-07-29

Yes, going to the court sucks, but like you said, at times when all the resources are expired and you have tried everything to reason with a person, and there is no middle ground, there is no other choice.

I agree with you with the "letting/not letting" the kids go, is not the best mentality. I simply said that I can sympathize and understand why some women may go to those extremes, although not the best choice.

Fair enough

Colombiana4Life · Foro Master

Dogo wrote:

Yeah.. no. I totally do not understand. That is plain immature, and I don't think there's any room for childish, impulsive accions/decisions when it comes to choosing what is best for your kids... IMO

I've been through some rough times with my baby's mama (granted, short lived) but I wouldn't in a million years deny him to see his mom,no matter how much I couldn't stand her or how much money she didn't give me (and vice versa, I'd hope) He doesn't deserve it, AND who am I to make that decision for him?
If I think his mom doesn't deserve to see him ,that is just MY opinion, not the child's. He can build his own opinion of his mom when he gains enough reason to do so.
Meanwhile, I will fight with her for financial support (or whatever) on a different level, away from my kid/s.
Even the going to the courts sucks, but I guess it just takes ONE unreasonable parent to get that ball rolling, and I guess sometimes there's just no choice, I agree

-- Edited by Dogo at 20:55, 2008-07-29

Yes, going to the court sucks, but like you said, at times when all the resources are expired and you have tried everything to reason with a person, and there is no middle ground, there is no other choice.

I agree with you with the "letting/not letting" the kids go, is not the best mentality. I simply said that I can sympathize and understand why some women may go to those extremes, although not the best choice.

Dogo · Comandante

Yeah.. no. I totally do not understand. That is plain immature, and I don't think there's any room for childish, impulsive accions/decisions when it comes to choosing what is best for your kids... IMO

I've been through some rough times with my baby's mama (granted, short lived) but I wouldn't in a million years deny him to see his mom,no matter how much I couldn't stand her or how much money she didn't give me (and vice versa, I'd hope) He doesn't deserve it, AND who am I to make that decision for him?
If I think his mom doesn't deserve to see him ,that is just MY opinion, not the child's. He can build his own opinion of his mom when he gains enough reason to do so.
Meanwhile, I will fight with her for financial support (or whatever) on a different level, away from my kid/s.
Even the going to the courts sucks, but I guess it just takes ONE unreasonable parent to get that ball rolling, and I guess sometimes there's just no choice, I agree

-- Edited by Dogo at 20:55, 2008-07-29

Colombiana4Life · Foro Master

Dogo wrote:

L'G you hit the nail...
I can't, for the life of me, understand how parents become SO childish when the best interest of their children is at stake.
The financial issue between you and your spouse should be a completely different, and very far apart, (and not exposed) issue than the one of protecting the well being -most importantly, feelings- of your kid/s.
The whole concept of "if you don't pay me, you don't get to do this or that with your kid" coming from a parent, is stunning to me. That does NOTHING for your kid, which should be the ONLY thing you should care about when a separation does happen.
Anyway, this "bit*ch/ass*hole" (whether it's by not helping out with $, or by playing "owner" of your kid) attitude, is short lived. Kids don't stay kids forever, and eventually will see for themselves who is and who isn't, being unreasonable.
The unreasonable parent will have a lot to be regretful about... but then it's too late

-- Edited by Dogo at 10:09, 2008-07-29

I agree with your mentality. But I can understand why a mother would have that reaction out of anger (of not letting the kid(s) see the dad). I know mothers that do it, not really because of the money, but the principle. How is it fair that a "man" can walk around, sacando pecho "look at me everyone, im such a good single dad" but yet you dont support your kids. But at the same time, you are right, it is NOT the best avenue to take. That's why i think when the situation becomes untolerable and there is no cooperation GO TO THE COURTS. And you're right, kids do start noticing things (even sooner than expected) of what's what and who's who, just by mere observation. They're not stupid.

El Duro · Foro Master

But I know if my ex had my son she would go to court for support.

LGigolo · Comandante

The good thing is that as children grow older, they understand more of that is going on and we can SHOW them that we ARE there for them no matter what. I tell mine that I am only a phone call away - and unless I am far away, I will drive to her and go see her. I can be on top of Angelina Jolie, if I get that phone call, I am out of there!

(Well, I don't quite word it to the kiddo like that! duh! LOL)

Dogo · Comandante

L'G you hit the nail...
I can't, for the life of me, understand how parents become SO childish when the best interest of their children is at stake.
The financial issue between you and your spouse should be a completely different, and very far apart, (and not exposed) issue than the one of protecting the well being -most importantly, feelings- of your kid/s.
The whole concept of "if you don't pay me, you don't get to do this or that with your kid" coming from a parent, is stunning to me. That does NOTHING for your kid, which should be the ONLY thing you should care about when a separation does happen.
Anyway, this "bit*ch/ass*hole" (whether it's by not helping out with $, or by playing "owner" of your kid) attitude, is short lived. Kids don't stay kids forever, and eventually will see for themselves who is and who isn't, being unreasonable.
The unreasonable parent will have a lot to be regretful about... but then it's too late

-- Edited by Dogo at 10:09, 2008-07-29

LGigolo · Comandante

Chuck wrote:

in some cases is. some women don't care or want the child support. In fact they don't even want the father in their child's life.

When women let their personal conflicts as spouses/couple interfere in the father/child relationship, they are not looking out for the best interest of the kids. Sometimes it becomes more of a vendetta and it's the b i t c h ' s way of supposedly "getting back" at the man. F' that.

Chuck · Guru

God wrote:

El Duro wrote:

God wrote:

El Duro wrote:

@ god. Hell no the **** doesn't give me jack ****

And do you b i t ch around ?

no cause i don't want her money and dont need it

No imagine if it was the other way around....this a one way street.

in some cases is. some women don't care or want the child support. In fact they don't even want the father in their child's life.

LGigolo · Comandante

Whether single mom or single dad - the parent without custody SHOULD help raise their children. Financially AND spending time, disciplining, entertaining, taking care of the children.

So we hear some single moms may b i t c h and complain about the baby's daddies not being supportive - If the dads are being a.holes, they are entitled. I'm sure if the number of single dads were as great as the number of single dads out there, we too would be hearing ourselves b i t c h and complain a bit more.

God · Foro Master

El Duro wrote:

God wrote:

El Duro wrote:

@ god. Hell no the **** doesn't give me jack ****

And do you b i t ch around ?

no cause i don't want her money and dont need it

No imagine if it was the other way around....this a one way street.

El Duro · Foro Master

God wrote:

El Duro wrote:

@ god. Hell no the **** doesn't give me jack ****

And do you b i t ch around ?

no cause i don't want her money and dont need it

God · Foro Master

El Duro wrote:

@ god. Hell no the **** doesn't give me jack ****

And do you b i t ch around ?

El Duro · Foro Master

@ god. Hell no the **** doesn't give me jack ****

God · Foro Master

El Duro wrote:

me

Does you ex pay suppor to ya ?

Colombiana4Life · Foro Master

DannyC wrote:

who is a single parent here?

Me

El Duro · Foro Master

me

God · Foro Master

DannyC wrote:

who is a single parent here?

right now I'm 50% Single dad this september I will be full time Single dad.

Dogo · Comandante

Moi. Well... A "part time" single parent, I suppose. (I have my son half the time, she has him the other half)

DannyC · Guru

who is a single parent here?

LGigolo · Comandante

Just because you leave the baby's momma doesn't mean you stop being a father. Money and Financial support is key, a necessity for one's child to be raised. But it doesn't just stop there, as dads we also have to provide - and maybe even more importantly - need to give our kiddos our TIME... Spend time with them, do stuff they enjoy and SHOW them that no matter what happened with mom and dad that even though mom and dad are no longer together, they are STILL raising the kids together, as a mom/dad team, even though they are living separately.

I know a woman with 3 kids - 3 different dads

... and I don't even judge that... whatever she did she did. She doesn't get support from ANY of the dads.... If she gets any $, it's basically peanuts and pocket change for the kids... Although she works, she struggles to make ends meet month. Do I feel sorry for her? NO, 'cause she refuses to take the dads to the FRO! For her, it's a thing of pride... I just feel bad for the kiddos.

DannyC · Guru

well this is the other dboy yall havent seen :)

PlayDead · Guru

DannyC wrote:

God wrote:

X4v13r wrote:

DannyC wrote:

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

our little danny is growing up

~X

Even mentally challneged people have bright moments.

lol f off man when it comes time to be serious i will be serious

what kinda of drugs have you been taking ...I want some lol

DannyC · Guru

God wrote:

X4v13r wrote:

DannyC wrote:

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

our little danny is growing up

~X

Even mentally challneged people have bright moments.

lol f off man biggrin when it comes time to be serious i will be serious

PlayDead · Guru

God wrote:

X4v13r wrote:

DannyC wrote:

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

our little danny is growing up

~X

Even mentally challneged people have bright moments.

touché!!! LMAO

God · Foro Master

X4v13r wrote:

DannyC wrote:

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

our little danny is growing up

~X

Even mentally challneged people have bright moments.

X4v13r · Comandante

DannyC wrote:

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

our little danny is growing up

~X

Hugo · Guru

simple, they just don't give a damn about their kids, i know a couple of deadbeat guys like that

Chilenita · Comandante

x 10

Guadalupana · Foro Master

No kidding

Dogo · Comandante

DannyC · Guru

toucy subject.........................

i shall be very serious here for a moment obviously i believe it takes two to make one ....i never understood the stuggles and everything that comes with it when raising a child while being a single mom........not until i dated women in that situtation and to be honest i fully admire them for not giving up and doing their thing for the best of their son/daughter its very hard and even me at times was like

to see them handle all that... all the expenses time stress baby father issues etc etc and them trying to better themsevles at the same time.....i know plenty of women as young as 18 who r currently in that situtation...what can i say? i take my hat of to them and full give them all the props in the world for doing a good job in raising their lil ones dispite the dads not there or simply not wanting to be their for them...

as for the men......straight up if they have some sord of concious deep down they would help but if they dont then what can i say?.........................not much about them...shows that they aint mature enough to handle their responsabilities

Chuck · Guru

i know, i was kidding. but i don't support irresponsable fathers.

X4v13r · Comandante

Chuck wrote:

doesn't matter what u call it he is still not paying for child support.

~X

that's right. and maybe he'll die in a terrible terrible ACCIDENT.

well that's a little to extreme if u ask me, now u want to leave the kid with father?........ in some cases it would be the best but in others it takes time for parents to come around.

~X

Chuck · Guru

doesn't matter what u call it he is still not paying for child support.

~X

that's right. and maybe he'll die in a terrible terrible ACCIDENT.

X4v13r · Comandante

Chuck wrote:

X4v13r wrote:

yes u r still a man just a bad father.

~X

and an a s s h o l e

doesn't matter what u call it he is still not paying for child support.

~X

Chuck · Guru

X4v13r wrote:

yes u r still a man just a bad father.

~X

and an a s s h o l e

X4v13r · Comandante

yes u r still a man just a bad father.

~X

Colombiana4Life · Foro Master

GENIE wrote:

You know its funny cuz i bet she still lets her kid see the dad even though hes not paying right? She should just take him to family court! and then they can keep tabs on him and if he doesnt pay they give him three chances and then 10days in jail that will teach him!!

What upsets me the most is that these women would rather suffer then make the guys pay and to me thats just plain stupidity! Im sorry but family court doesnt cost that much and just go to family services or Legal Aid they help single mothers but latina women stick by there stupid men sometimes even when they shouldnt!

Trust me, this situation hits TOO CLOSE TO HOME for me. That's why i will limit my response. But yes, the courts are a great avenue. So if a "guy" wants to be cocky and think he can outdo the system, sure, keep thinking that. Stuff like that will come back and bite them in the arse, sooner or later, in more ways then one. Not only through court but through God and life itself

Mermaid · Guru

Here in Canada , women have more oportunities to receive financial help from their children's father. The family court process is not long and they will enforce that the so called fathers pay child support.
@El Duro: A father who is raising his children is entitled to ask for child support. Of course we don't see this very often , because usually mothers stay with their children.

PRINCESSA · TOP Guru

@ MJ - LOL

I think we do have a great system but if the guys not making any money or is a bum then the court can't make him pay anything.

Either way it's horrible.

El Duro · Foro Master

Guys like that should get their c0cks cut off so that they can't reproduce, but some women are stupid they have the right to take them to court. I know if I were in that situation my son mom would.@ chile...... But what about women who don't pay child support? Would you tell their ex to take them to court and go though the legal battle