Q. How d'you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? A. Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Q: What's the similarity between a woman and a condom? A: They both spend more time in your wallet than on your di ck!
Q: How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house? A: Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time.
Q: How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? A: Put a nipple on it.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito quits sucking when you smack it.
Q: What's the smartest thing to come out of a woman's mouth? A: Einstein's co ck.
Q: Why does the bride always wear white? A: Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
Q: What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A: A battery has a positive side.
Q: A brunette, a blonde and a redhead in third grade. Who has the biggest ti ts? A: The blonde, because she's 18.
Q: Did you hear about the new paint called "Blonde" paint? A: It's not very bright, but it spreads easy.
Q: Why do men pay more than women for car insurance? A: Because women don't get bl ow jobs while they're driving.
Q: Why are Women's feet shorter than men's feet? A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
Q: Why did god give men penises? A: So they'd always have at least one way to shut a woman up!
Q. Why is divorce so expensive? A. Because it's worth it.
Q: What do women & dog turds have in common? A: The older they are,the easier they are to pick up!
Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A: Nothing, you already told her twice!
Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead? A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight pints.
Q: What's the difference between pre-menstrual tension and B.S.E? A: One's mad cow disease, the other's an agricultural problem.
Q: If your wife comes out of the kitchen to whine at you, what have you usually done wrong? A: Made her chain too long.
Q: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing maching will never be able to support you.
Q: What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence? A: Divorced.
Q: How can you tell if a woman is happy? A: Who cares?
Q: Why do women like intelligent men? A: Opposites attract.
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Not everything I post or say on foro are necesarily true facts. <- THAT is a fact! :blankstare: