Baina wrote: Everyone, of course, griefs differently. Some may like to be alone...and let things pass....Others may seek other outlets for their grief (church, groups, etc..) So then another question arrises......
HOW LONG DO YOU MOURN FOR??!?!?
As Long As It Takes . . . I Don't Feel That You Should Have To Mourn For Any Set Amount Of Time. I Keep The Departed In My Prayers On A Daily Basis.
oh no u didnt!!! i know where u live mona watch a tomate flying to ur window esta noche!!!
QUE?!!!! me estas amenasando con un tomate feo, podrido y tuyido??
Nah i'm kidding .
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
HOLY i haven't had those things in the longest time!!!
Anyway Genie, gracias por ofrecer, pero no tengo ganas.
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I don't think, i'd ever emparejarme again if my +1 passed (god forbid).
thats a horrible thing to think about... I couldnt even bare the thought
It wasn't a thought brought on by choice!!! Genie started it!!! Es culpa de ella!!!!
okay you two salvis seriously need to get with the program i have not done nada!! y si me tiras un tomate te yo mas todavia!! oh btw ladies guess what my daddy brought me!!! give up hocotes mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm so good y guess guess nance fresco mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Genie---i heard you were making chimol para la carne asada. So here you go:
Oh you need a few more? ok
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I don't think, i'd ever emparejarme again if my +1 passed (god forbid).
thats a horrible thing to think about... I couldnt even bare the thought
It wasn't a thought brought on by choice!!! Genie started it!!! Es culpa de ella!!!!
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
@Baina - mandatory i think it is 9days de luto! but if its a spouse its a year! or something crazy like that!
Geez! how long do you think it should be? I'd be in luto for ever!
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I don't think, i'd ever emparejarme again if my +1 passed (god forbid).
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I think ppl. say those type of comments cus it's "The political correct" things to say. Your not goin to say anything bad, plus if u felt negative @ the particular person that died, then why in hell are u at the funeral. Right?
See I never say anything about any1 that dies, cus unless they are my family I feel that wat I think is irrelevant to that family or the dead person. If I show up in a funeral is out of respect to the family or the dead person itself. With that I feel I've done my share & I feel good about it & that's all that matters (how i feel).
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
Honestly, i would not want them there. Their fake words will do nothing to ease my grief. It would make me angrier to see a person who made my loved one's life miserable.
Exactly!!!
@Luna: It's not a question as to what I would prefer to hear. If that person doesn't like my friend or family member and yet they're still coming to my face saying, "I'm so sorry for your loss, he/she was such a good person" then really and truly, I don't care to see or hear that person.
Example, I hate your mom (and you know that) and I tell you, "Sorry to hear your mom's not feeling well, she's such a sweet lady."
Is that your preference? To hear me be such a hypocrite????
PS - I your mama!!!
I don't know her but any good mama is good in my books!!!
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I think that if YOU, yourself, personaly, didn't know the deceased...then it's retarded for you to comment something positive or negative about the person. You may feel sorry and send your condolences to the family as support for them in a time of grief...but if you didn't know the person..then direct comments about the same should be reserved...IMHO.
However.....Regarding the 'social gathering' at funerals. I do think that that plays an important part in the healing process for those who knew the departed. IF you are religious...then it also plays a part. Ones passing on to the next life is supposed to be viewed as a joyous moment...and should be celebrated.
When my Grandfather passed away in Panama....there was a HUGE party thrown in his name. BBQ, wine...the whole nine....Say what you will....but I think it was great for the family to share stories...and maybe hear things that you never knew about, in this case, my grandpa.
Everyone, of course, griefs differently. Some may like to be alone...and let things pass....Others may seek other outlets for their grief (church, groups, etc..) So then another question arrises......
@el Pibe - have you ever been to a funeral back home?? Cuz back home everyone comes and its food drinks you sometimes even have old rancheras playing (speaking from my families funerals) you have the widow and women either cooking or saying prayers and the rosery and the men are drinking and laughing telling stories its social but its not sad its trying to change the mood i guess!
I would prefer something like that, where it's more of a party and people reminiscing of good times instead of feeling sorry for me (or the departed).
I so agree with LUNA on this and in a sense i truly think that ppl have that soft side and truly do feel sympathetic to the family that just lost someone that you either knew well or knew briefly a sign of respect in a sense. I commented on Anthony V as saying he was a friend of my mothers and they kept in touch here and there but out of respect i would give my condolences and thats it. Its also like i hate when ppl tell you omg i know hes in a better place or god knows why he took him to me those are empty words! Tell me something like omg i remember when i was younger with so n so or storeis that will make me laugh not empty lies!
@el Pibe - have you ever been to a funeral back home?? Cuz back home everyone comes and its food drinks you sometimes even have old rancheras playing (speaking from my families funerals) you have the widow and women either cooking or saying prayers and the rosery and the men are drinking and laughing telling stories its social but its not sad its trying to change the mood i guess!
Actually the last funeral that I had to go to when I was in Colombia I was 10 years old, so to me everything seemed normal. I understand what you are saying by trying to change the mood, and some places do through big parties to celebrate the life of the person who passed on. However, I guess I just feel like a funeral home should not be a "hang out", it should be a place to pay their respects. But like I said, thats just how I think of it.
Just recently, I was at a funeral from my friends grandmother, and I felt bad just sitting there socializing with my friends, it just didn't seem right to me, so I paid my respects, and I left.
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
Honestly, i would not want them there. Their fake words will do nothing to ease my grief. It would make me angrier to see a person who made my loved one's life miserable.
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I so agree with LUNA on this and in a sense i truly think that ppl have that soft side and truly do feel sympathetic to the family that just lost someone that you either knew well or knew briefly a sign of respect in a sense. I commented on Anthony V as saying he was a friend of my mothers and they kept in touch here and there but out of respect i would give my condolences and thats it. Its also like i hate when ppl tell you omg i know hes in a better place or god knows why he took him to me those are empty words! Tell me something like omg i remember when i was younger with so n so or storeis that will make me laugh not empty lies!
@el Pibe - have you ever been to a funeral back home?? Cuz back home everyone comes and its food drinks you sometimes even have old rancheras playing (speaking from my families funerals) you have the widow and women either cooking or saying prayers and the rosery and the men are drinking and laughing telling stories its social but its not sad its trying to change the mood i guess!
Why, I dunno, but I think a fair or respectable thing to do, at a moment like that, is to mention the person's good traits, and make no mention of the bad ones
What for?
Because of what Luna said Otherwise NO ONE would have ANYTHING to say at funerals. (I'm sure we all have bad traits) *hint hint* However, if I thought someone's bad traits outweighed their good ones, I'd just sit in the back sipping on coffee, and not say anything... If I went at all
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
Hence hypocrisy!!!
granted... but you didn't answer the question... which would you prefer to hear? I'm sure the LAST thing on your mind would be, "gee, this person is such a hyprocrite". You'll probably say thanks and move on.
@ LB - what stemmed this question? its clearly something that moved you enough to post it at 4 in the morning! Crazy girl! GET SOME SLEEP!
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
that would be awesome! And then collect it from the next of kin. lol
I dont think that people should comment on what they dont know... especially at a time like that.
As to why people do it, it seems to be the only thing to do.. speak well of the departed. How bad would it look if you really did say they were a jerkfaced a$$wipe and that they owed you money? Not very nice at all.
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
Hence hypocrisy!!!
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Putting the hypocrasy factor aside.....(I feel like MJ does about that issue)
I'm just curious as to why when someone dies....EVERYONE has the same nice comments to say about that person......"he was so sweet, the nicest man in the world, he meant so much to us"....etc etc etc......
I mean, if it's true.....GREAT!!.....but if it's not....hmmmmmmm....
I'm not saying come out and bluntly say "he was a prick and nobody liked him".....but why say things that are not true or heartfelt...for the sake of just saying something......if you didn't like him/her while they were alive.....why be so fake when this person dies......what does one have to gain with that??
I just don't get it.....
And the worse part is people who never even cared about the dead person while he/she was alive....are suddenly "the best friends"......well, I guess that's the hypocrasy thing again....
I agree completely with you here. Not only does this bother me, but how funerals just become a social event. People come in say a few words to the family for their loss, and then just hang out and "shoot the $hit". I would prefer that people came paid their respects, said their few kind words, and then left, rather than hang around socializing and joking around with their friends. This is not a social event, and I beleive it should be treated with more respect.
wow... that's a hard pill to swallow for a Tuesday morning.... GOOOOOD AM Foro...
anyhooo... I think people make the effort to comment on the good things is to help alleviate the grief of the mourning family. Let's put it into perspective, let's say when your relative (mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather) passed away they had a couple of people that attended the funeral, out of respect, that they had butted heads with in life, would you want that person to say to you, "I'm sorry for your loss. Your relative was a nice person" OR "I'm sorry for your loss but your relative was a jerk. They still owe me $5.00"
I'm a believer in, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all but people are compelled to say nice things to you at your time of grief because they want you to know they feel your pain and a small kind word could help alleviate that.
Why, I dunno, but I think a fair or respectable thing to do, at a moment like that, is to mention the person's good traits, and make no mention of the bad ones
What for?
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Why, I dunno, but I think a fair or respectable thing to do, at a moment like that, is to mention the person's good traits, and make no mention of the bad ones
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The opinions expressed by this poster should always be considered offensive to Guadalupipi.
That's why when it was noted Anthony V had passed away, as much as I felt sorry for his family, I couldn't make a comment because I didn't know him personally nor did I know him well as an artist.
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
I'm not really referring to attending the actual funeral (that's a respect thing).....but the comments people make when they find out someone has died.....COMMENTS....not reminiscing about the person........it's always the same words, even if the person was not a good person....or a contributing human being while he was alive.....u know?
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"To be a good Promoter you must have the heart of a Gambler and the mind of a Computer"
Actually, let me backtrack a bit. If i didn't know the person that passed, but the person is a relative of a good friend, it's only a sign of respect to my friend to be with them at a difficult time. At least to give my condolences. Only then would i be there.
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
Who knows girlie, but i wouldn't do that. If i didn't know the person why would i even be at the funeral? if i knew the person and didn't like them, even more reason for me not to be at the funeral.
I hate funerals.
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The opinions expressed by this poster can be offensive and are mainly directed at Dogo. Delta gamma b i t c h-orama. Copyright 2008 All rights reserved.
Yes Ladybug, I agree with you 100%. I mean 2 months ago I went to a funeral. A friend of my mom past away and they grew up together in El Salvador....
I was there only for support and my comments were to his kids, just said I am sorry for your lost... I am truly sorry you know.... But I noticed some people coming up to them with stupid stories on how they met and how they uised to play together and stuff..... Its a bunch of crap, he grew up in El Salvador you know, my mom was discasted by some people there...
Anyway like I said I agree with you but some people just like the attention and that is why they are hyprocrits (don't know if this is the right spelling)....
Putting the hypocrasy factor aside.....(I feel like MJ does about that issue)
I'm just curious as to why when someone dies....EVERYONE has the same nice comments to say about that person......"he was so sweet, the nicest man in the world, he meant so much to us"....etc etc etc......
I mean, if it's true.....GREAT!!.....but if it's not....hmmmmmmm....
I'm not saying come out and bluntly say "he was a prick and nobody liked him".....but why say things that are not true or heartfelt...for the sake of just saying something......if you didn't like him/her while they were alive.....why be so fake when this person dies......what does one have to gain with that??
I just don't get it.....
And the worse part is people who never even cared about the dead person while he/she was alive....are suddenly "the best friends"......well, I guess that's the hypocrasy thing again....
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"To be a good Promoter you must have the heart of a Gambler and the mind of a Computer"
Nah i'm kidding 
. 
Genie started it!!! 
Es culpa de ella!!!! 
your mama!!! 
